Mollena Williams

Jun 132016
 
 Dear Mr. Elba:
Purr.

I’ll be in me bunk.

I admire your skill and talent as a performer. And I am thrilled to see a Black man ascend to the ranks of megastar in an industry that does everything to deny and homogenize. I do not wish to cast any shadow upon the tremendous nature of your achievements. However. You are making some career choices that are proving difficult for me.

 

Your decision to play Shere Khan in The Jungle Book means humans all over the world are strangely aroused by a Tiger of Dubious Morals. Would this have been the alpha and omega, I could have accepted this as an (odd, slightly uncomfortable slightly hot) anomaly.

 

Ride 'em, cowboy.

Hey, it worked for Zeus.

But then you struck again. I wound up watching several movies on a recent flight, and found it difficult to understand why I found Zootopia‘s Chief Bogo vaguely titillating until my research uncovered your particular voice talent as the culprit. But I understand. These are, of course, plum roles and who can blame you?

 

However the latest situation is troubling. Eroticising a tiger is hardly a stretch. Even the brawny majesty of the water buffalo can easily conjure iconography reminiscent of Greek mythology and the troublesome allure of the bullring.  But I am gravely concerned for my sanity and that of the planet when I learned that you are also in Finding Dory. My (initial, fleeting, freakish) hopes that your talent would bring to life some deep sea cephalopod – (after all, we have hundreds of years of history where tentacled creatures are represented within and the focus erotic fantasy!) but my hopes were dashed when I discovered that Fluke is, in fact, a seal.

No. just...no.

Oh dear. No.

Pinniped proclivities be damned…this is just way too far into an uncanny valley of WTF bonerism. I fear that, in several days, I’ll discover wide swaths of my subconscious crying havoc and letting slip the dogs of seal schtupping wet dreams. Like, really wet.

 

 

There is not much to be done for it and so I am sure to be dragged deeper in to all manner of freaky anthro yiff porn.

 

But I can handle it. I am, after all, an Executive Pervert.

 

Just promise – I beg You – if you’re approached to do the next installation of A Bug’s Life or Toy Story…have mercy. I cain’t be lusting after no bugs.

 

…again.

 

I’m still scarred from a run-in with a cache of Bondage Fairies comics.

 

Yours, Most Sincerely,

 

Mrs. Mollena Lee Williams-Haas

May 212016
 

One of the most ephemeral emotional states is that of satisfaction. The sensation of pleasure. By its very nature fleeting, satiation –  emotional satisfaction – is transitory. Emotions do not last. Persistence of vision, that illusory sensation of individual moments weaving together to form a coherent image – is not dissimilar to emotional memory, which can cling to us as we move in time.  Of course there are situations where, due to circumstance or chemistry, our emotional states remain on the extremes of experience or lie dormant and create the sensation of stasis.

Geo & Mo COkesFor most humans our emotional state, while variable, enables us to experience a wide range of feelings and yet retain perspective that reminds us that the extremes are not permanent and time will move us through them.

One of the main motivations for my alcoholism was a desire to control my emotional states, which frequently floundered beyond my control. If I was a little high on alcohol, my social anxiety became manageable, that worry about my finances gnawed less intensely on my nerves, and life seemed less of a meaningless grind.  Of course, there is only so long one can short-circuit the organic response to the vagaries of life and eventually you will find yourself dependant  – and possibly even addicted – to an artificial emotional modification that has rather unpleasant side-effects. Including death. SO… you can choose that continued oblivion or you can serenity prayer yourself the fuck out of that death spiral and accept the things you can’t change, have the guts to fuck up the shit you can, and have the goddamn smarts to be able to discern the fucking difference.

No, that’s not the original serenity prayer but fuck it. I gotta be me. Continue reading »

May 032016
 

Gatewood-Side-eye-maskI don’t cower

I don’t kneel

I am never ‘less than’

I don’t beg

I don’t shrink

I am loud and aggressive

I’m not abused

I don’t take shit

I push back when need be

I pull hard when I have to

I fight demons

I feed monsters

I don’t iron

or scrub toilets

I make business deals

I make time

and dinner

I set boundaries

I move mountains

Defuse landmines

I comfort and Correct

I set deadlines

I make mistakes

And amends

I listen

Even more than I talk and

I talk a LOT

I’m loved and

I love hard

I love like

A Demon

A Mother

A Sister

A Lover

A Pet

Like

A slave

 

Apr 112016
 

Years back, when social media meant AOL profiles and pages on GeoCities, people relied on nicknames and handles as barriers against being discovered as a secret freak.  Google wasn’t a thing, reverse phone-number lookups and ISP tracking were not commonly available with the click of a mouse, and anonymity was easy. Then things began to develop such that the percentage of lives lived online multiplied exponentially and it has become necessary for most folks to have a public online presence. For many folks, this means they are obligated to tuck away or tone down aspects of their lives in order to maintain their careers or family connections. It is an unfortunate truth that there are people in positions of power in our lives who wouldn’t accept us if we were living a lifestyle against which they felt enmity, or about which they were ignorant to the point of fear.

I am fortunate. I don’t have to keep it secret. Even when I worked for Wells Fargo, their liberal, accepting and forward-thinking policies meant my being involved in the BDSM and Leather communities wasn’t an issue. My orientation to their Bay Area team was lead by a self-identified transwoman. One of my co-workers was the Empress of the SF Royal Drag Court. Another had been International Mr. Drummer and was well known as a gay leather pin-up. Hell, they provided the portable ATMs for the Folsom Street Fair!  I made sure I always worked for companies and businesses where inclusivity was a feature, not a bug.

And yet, I have felt the momentary sting when I am disowned from public connection by a friend or acquaintance because they do not wish to be associated with a kinky person. Like BDSM is a contagion that will besmirch you. Leathery , kinky cooties, out to make you look…well…perverted!

pervert cootieLet me state that I find it bloody strange that my non-kinky friends and acquaintances never seem to feel that they have to evade me because I am kinky.  

I want to give a shout out to all of those folks because you give me life. All of you – parents, spiritual leaders, doctors, lawyers, midwives, teachers, bankers, bakers, artists – all of you who are not ashamed or reluctant to claim me as a friend….you are changing the world, one drop at a time.

I give them dap because they don’t seem to worry about someone saying “Hey how do you know that pervert?” Continue reading »

 Education  Comments Off on Dont Fear Pervert Cooties.
Mar 302016
 

Abiola Abrams is a raging powerstorm of amazingness and so when she says “I need you to write me something for Essence online!” I’m all “HELL YEAH!”

You can read the article here, but it only contains one of the three tips  shared. Keep reading to see what else I had to say, under pressure, wondering who the hell would listen to advice from me anyway.

Look at this happy Black couple stock image and weep at their magnificence.

Gaze in Awe upon this Happy Black Couple stock image and weep at their magnificence.

“11 Sex Secrets From the Experts That Will Set Your Bed On Fire!”

Continue reading »

 Musings  Comments Off on Get the rest of the Essence!
Mar 292016
 

Thanks to The Pleasure Chest, I’ll be sharing a lecture right here in New York on April 20th, 2016!

DOMINANCE & SUBMISSION: HOT FICTION, HOTTER FACTS! WITH MOLLENA WILLIAMS-HAASpleasure chest

Pleasure Chest, New York UES

Wednesday April 20th, 2016 8:00 pm – 10:00 pm

Many of us have hot fantasies of giving over control or taking charge in the bedroom. for some, these desires are so sexually charged that the lure of dominance and submission becomes . but how do you go from an egalitarian relationship to one where someone calls the shots? how do you manage to be dominant without being domineering? is it possible to be submissive without being spineless? how do you negotiate this delicate dance of power without pissing everyone off? and do we REALLY need if you’re curious about dominance and submission, or have been exploring power exchange and are looking for new insights into your play, welcome! in this class, we will explore different types of PE (Power Exchange) relationships, from top and bottom to dominant and submissive to master and slave in all of the wonderful variations! We will be covering many of the intricacies of managing these dynamics such as:

• Self-exploration
• Negotiating with yourself, and with your partner
• Assessing Needs, Wants and Desires
• Physical, Mental and Emotional Safety

Whether you’re interested in the private intimacy of bedroom play or wish to delve into the broader kink community, you’ll have a safe space to ask your questions, discuss your desires, and kick around your kinks! Bring your questions, concerns, curiosities and an open mind!

Guest Educator: Mollena Williams Haas

We do not offer advance registration or reserved seating for free workshops or events. Attendance is on a first come, first served basis. Early arrival is recommended to secure your spot!

 Education  Comments Off on Local Perversion.
Mar 192016
 

Those who were at our wedding – or watched it on LiveStream – were able to hear the “sketches” of two parts of a piece Georg was writing in my name to commemorate our wedding. This all came about because someone asked if we were going to have his compositions in our wedding and I was amused, since nothing he’s written to date was really of a celebratory nature and certainly not anything one would think of for an occasion such as a wedding!

Unless, of course, it was like Persephone being wedded to Hades or some shit.

But he, with traditional Austrian stubbornness augmented by the particular flavor of Styrian obstinacy, decided that of COURSE he would write music for our wedding. And it just debuted on the March 17th.

drei stucke pic

The reception for the premier? STELLAR. He received tremendous audience response and six callbacks in the curtain calls. Believe me, for an audience of mostly Germans, this is bloody epic.

When I first heard even just the sketches at the wedding, I was amazed. Sitting in the rehearsals and hearing all of these talented artists working so hard to realize his vision, I was delighted. To sit in the Prinzregententheater and hear the RIAS Kammerchor singing and the Munich Chamber Orchestr (brilliantly and passionately conducted by Herr Alexander Liebreich) bring such resplendent complexity to the piece was spiritually uplifting beyond words.

After the concert, one of the lovely members of the Choir (she was really kind to me throughout) presented us with the sweetest and thoughtfullest gift…a whole buncha little matchboxes with some perverts on the top! They’d used a photo they’d taken of us during the rehearsals.

rias kammerchor matches

How cute is that?!? ÜBERCUTE is how.

 Going's On  Comments Off on Drei stücke für me!
Feb 222016
 

crucible banner
Yeah, I do not love camping. I just…I don’t like dirt.
Or insects.
Or “roughing it” even in the relatively benign version of such as is offered by the Kink Camps that happen here and there across the USA.
And I have, for various reasons, gone against my better judgement several times and attended them.
Once, I had a violent asthma attack and resulting horrible sinusitis because of a bale of hay.
Fuck those fucking things.
Then I was molested by a swarm of stinkbugs and red ghotdamned centipedes, and had ANOTHER bad case of sinusitis because of black mold.
Fuck them bastards and that bullshit.
Third time’s a charm and how charming is it to never be able to sleep because of drunk-ass screaming people a few hundred  yards from your cabin  who were hollering ripped and plastered by noon and stayed that way until about 4 AM.
Motherfuck all those fuckers.

SO yeah, I was not gonna be doing it. Ever. Again.

And then of course Der Spousemeister is lured by our “friend” Barbara (baleful side-eye) into considering going to Camp Crucible. Since he is the boss, guess where we’ll be from May 28th – June 4th?
(Yes, the camp runs a bit longer than that on either side but we have to be in and get back to Europe during this time period, so we have to arrive a day late and leave a couple days early.
And I am not sad.)
Anyway, if you’d like to come and enjoy my suffering and glowering while occasionally dressing up like a pony, or watch one of the world’s preeminent living contemporary composers running around nekkid as the day he was born, ogling everyone and loving life, you should come join us!

Or, if, you know, an amazing camping experience with wonderful, welcoming folks and a unique opportunity for extended community bonding and playing and rutting like stoats in the woods is your thing.

 

 Education  Comments Off on Never Say Never.
Jan 082016
 

PD-paddle-shotMollena Speaks

on

the “Prime Directive

Date & Time: Saturday, January 09, 2016 · 6:00 PM – 8:00 PM  
Location:
Tampa Bay Phoenix Club

12850 91st Street North, Largo, FL 33773   @ map

Cost: Free!
Dress code: Street-legal/casual.
Description:

The Tampa Bay Phoenix Club is pleased to have Mollena presenting on the “Prime Directive” and power exchange relationships. She is a nationally-known presenter, and this is one you won’t want to miss!

 Education  Comments Off on *FREE* Class, Tampa / St. Pete!
Dec 312015
 
Before the end of the year and I am finished packing my owner/s suitcase. I have a particular system, as one might when packing and unpacking bits and pieces of one’s life around the country and all over Europe has fallen into the realm of the quotidian.
Or at least a couple of times a month.
Packing cubes have saved (the shredded, desperate wind and time torn tatters of) my sanity and I can count out the number i need with a sightless hand in the basket where they are stored. One smaller pouch for 10 pairs of socks, another for 10 underpants, 10 undershirts in another, pants for work and relaxing in their own container. A light jacket, two swearers, 3 button-down shirts and 2 turtlenecks in a garment bag, folded in half as to minimize wrinkles. Into the suitcase goes an addict’s tools: a portable Nespresso (one of two, because we need one that runs on USA as well as EU currents) and sufficient pods to facilitate the caffeine addict’s daily drug dose. Into the suitcase also go the gifts for his youngest offspring, with whom he will be visiting as well as the games that they play together while he is with her.
Packed and weighed to insure that it is under the weight limit, I add in some slippers, just in case his feet get cold.
He returns to the bedroom, smiles as he sees me stuffing the last of the shirts into the last of the pouches.
“Dahling. Thank you. I can feel the love you give me.”
His consideration of the reality of service as love and erotic fulfillment is still new.
When we were in Europe, we had a wonderful series of private sessions with my friend Rebecca Lowrie, a sexuality and intimacy coach and…healer, really. We were with her to talk about some of the Stuff we are working on in our relationship. Too much to mention here but we have, my owner and I, very different experiences of our sexual histories.
Deborah Addington How has your perspective on service, as an act that nurtures your Spirit, shifted over time? Do you experience embodied differences in where/how you feel the Eros of service in your flesh?