I was inspired to write a piece about coming out to my Mom about being kinky. I was inspired by a moment of very deep gratitude when i saw a friend talking about how unaccepting her Mother had been about her sexuality.
So fucking Uncool.
I’mÂ doublyÂ proud that, when I called Mom to ask if she minded me writing the piece, and on top of that if she was OK with my using a photo of the two if us together, she said she was happy to have both of those things happen.
Not bad for a nice Baptist church lady, eh?
From the column…
Â I took a deep breath, asked her if she really wanted to know, since it had to do with my sexuality. She said yes, sheÂ didÂ want to know. So I braced myself and told her Iâ€™d been in Washington DC to teach a class at Black Rose… a kink and BDSM convention.Â
â€œBondage & Discipline, Dominance & Submission Sadism & Masochism. You know, the whips and chains people.â€Â
â€œOh! Wow. And here I though you were a lesbian and were embarrassed to tell me.â€Â
I laughed silently. But I figured now wasnâ€™t the time to lay on the outing myself as bisexual as well: if my high-school triad hadnâ€™t given it away, she didnâ€™t need this additional data point right then!Â
She asked me some surprisingly challenging questions, and when she asked me how it was to give people spankings, I realized I had to come out to her again… as a submissive.Â
â€œNow thatÂ isÂ a surprise. I would have though you would be a dominatrix!â€Â
â€œYeah, Ma, so does everyone else…â€Â