Yeah, I’d pull that apart in about 90 seconds. But it IS pretty!

I was contacted recently by award-winning journalist Alexis Stodghill, writing from an MSNBC e-mail address and on the staff of TheGrio.com. She asked me if I’d be interested in answering a few questions about BDSM, specifically race play, since I’d been quoted in a column that is getting a whole lot of talk and that touches on that topic. The column, a response to a letter sent to Abiola Abrams, hit on the critical issue of consent and boundaries in relationships. The most important thing, from my perspective as someone who speaks and teaches about consensual BDSM, was that the fact that some people do consent to edgy role-playing in a CONSENSUAL manner was addressed in Ms. Abram’s response.

Ms. Stodghill, seeing the resultant discussion, decided to ask me to expand on the topic. Yep yep, I was hesitant. The Black community is just starting to have more open discussion about sex, and to zipline right into dissecting a type of play that even some  jaded, hardened perverts won’t tough with a fen foot bullwhip and that incites completely understandable visceral reactions from the majority of people is…daunting. To say the least.

I wrote a response and hoped for the best. The full text of my answers to the questions is here.

 I am most gratified to see that very difficult topics are starting to hit more mainstream media outlets with a careful, respectful, nuanced perspective rather than the easy and obvious take on BDSM and Alternative Sexuality. I am very grateful that Ms. Stodghill deftly handled this difficult topic, and if you appreciated her reportage, please consider letting her know so on Twitter or on Facebook.  We take small steps towards releasing shame and gaining understanding, small steps every day. These discussions are steps in an amazing direction, leading us closer to the place where we don’t have to live in fear of losing jobs, friends, family, being shunned by those we thought were friends because we live and love differently. May we continue to walk forward.

Part one: http://www.mollena.com/2013/02/blackface-still-racist-yall

Part Two http://www.mollena.com/2013/02/racism-in-leather

Many people continue to defend the racism of a white male drag-queen donning blackface as “humor” and insist that we ignore it if we don’t like it.

Many people feel free to tell me how to react to racism, even as I stand and see people I considered friends and allies walk away from me when I ask for help fighting this battle.

Many people turn a blind eye to this issue because they don’t have time.

There are many examples of how, over the course of history, this country has stepped away from ugliness and hatred. And there are many examples of how our attitudes are still ugly.

These are two photographs of lynchings of Black Americans by white Americans. You’ll note the smiling faces, the little white girl beaming up and the mutilated corpse of a Black man who never had a day in court. The little white boys standing beside their stern faced fathers. Continue reading »

 I am so fucking stoked, you guys!  I have  for years wanted to  make a space for teaching, learning, peer-sharing and togetherness for submissive and slave types, and it is starting to happen! Thanks to Rebekah Beneteau of Wise Wild Feminine, we have a date for the Northeast!

Submissive & Slave Identified or curious?

You might wish to hold June 22~23rd open: I’m holding a Submissive & Slave Summit, & Sleepover in Philly!

It’ll be a process focused retreat, on building intention, finding your “Submission Statement” and communicating from the heart. The group will be limited to twenty folks so that we can all have time to connect and share.

But wait! There’s more! Our special guest will be Laura Antoniou who will join us for “Dishing over Dinner!”

Detailed info to follow, but I am so excited that this dream of mine is starting to coalesce, I wanted to start spreadin’ the news!  Stay tuned, I will be announcing a Seattle event soon, too! And maybe even <gasp> a European edition!

Join the Facebook Group here for updates!

When I google image searched “ambiguous street signs” this was the FIRST thing that came up, yo.

I will be up in Massachusetts, y’all! on Sunday, December 16th, I’ll be doing not one but TWO classes in Boston! Well, technically Brookline and Somerville but whatever. I still can’t get the hang of the geography there, and the *&^%$ lack of communicative street signs doesn’t help…

…but I digress ;-D

This past few weeks has been NUTS, yo. Travel insanity, and despite the fact I tried really hard to leave time to relax, it wound up being mostly about dental nightmares and unpleasant financial news. And woven in amidst the whirlwind of planning for the amazing tour that Lee Harrington and I are doing in support of the release of Playing Well With Others is an undercurrent of that nagging sadness thing. It feels so odd to be simultaneously thrilled at the stuff one does and have the feeling, at the end of the day, that it doesn’t quite land without someone I can turn to for that pat on the head and place at their feet. I know, some day. One day. But not today.

But carry on we must!

Thanks to the amazing generosity of some amazing friends, I am able to study with the wonderful Barbara Carellas in late November as she conducts her Urban Tantra intensive! I’ve never taken an intensive course before…and I have certainly not studied sexual esoterica in such a focused manner so I am excited and a bit nervous.

I managed to add a bit of time to my trip to London and that open space drew in some amazing opportunities!

I will be doing a unique Storytelling Event in conjunction with Wotever World!

Ever wonder what it takes to make a pervert? How about a Perverted Negress? Join professional storyteller, award-winning Kink, Leather & BDSM educator, critically acclaimed and award wining actor, International Executive Pervert Mollena for a ONE NIGHT STAND in London! You’ll have the opportunity to be regaled with tales from the downright perky to the deeply perverse and even have the opportunity to plumb her depths… metaphorically speaking, of course…..by asking those probing questions. You think it’s easy to find someone to respect you after you lick their boots? Not by a longshot…just ask Mollena. Her hilarious, erotic and poignant stories will surprise and delight even other perverts with their vulnerable openness and honesty. This irrepressible submissive diva will entertain you and your questions in her UK performance debut!This event is brought to you by the magic wand that is Wotever World & Mollena Williams, kindly supported by The Flying Dutchman and all the Kinky Fold of London. READ MORE AND GET TICKETS HERE!

And there will be proper classtime as well!

Continue reading »