Seven years ago today, I was in rehab, on about six different medications to try to keep me alive but sedated so I wouldn’t have seizures. Because roughly 10% of alcoholics who stop drinking cold turkey are killed by brain seizures.

I was ashamed and terrified but determined to try to live.

I met my demon that first night, and we ave grown so much since then.

I had a dream about a tattoo of that date. My counselor told me it was a bad idea. “First-timers relapse within the first year at the rate of over 75%. You don’t want that reminder when it is important to you to continue to focus on your recovery.”

Well of course that only made me more determined and I said “I will not relapse. But if I DO and I somehow survive that I’ll go back, get an X through this date and get the next one below it. And the next. As many as it takes.”

But I like this one just fine.

Today is seven years later and the shock of abundance & joy in my life grows daily.

Thank you to the friends who stuck around…and the ones who did not.

Thank you to my owner, for showing me the miracles are still happening.

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  1. literalman on March 14, 2014 at 7:41 PM

    On the one hand: huzzah, huzzah, huzzah, huzzah, huzzah, huzzah, huzzah!

    On the other hand: talk about “burying the lead”! … when did the Composer become the one to whom you belong?

  2. Tequila Rose on March 15, 2014 at 12:34 AM

    I am so proud of you! I want to leap through my laptop screen and give you the BIGGEST hug ever! Keep on kicking ass!

  3. Stephanie on March 15, 2014 at 12:42 AM

    Definitely not “burying the lead”. The lead is the struggle, the accomplishment, and the journey. It was written as it should be.

    Your owner sounds like a great guy, but your focus seems right on track to me with this one.

    Love you, Mo! You rock. You are beautiful and brave and strong and I’m happy to know you.