Sunny with a 98% chance of masturbation.
Folsom weekend!Â Â
Thank the gods that my friend Julie went to the UK this week and left me her car,Â because it is infinitely more preferable for me to panic-pack a metric-fuckton of fetish wear and saucy clothing and throw it all into the trunk of her car than it is for me to thoughtfully plan outfits.
Besides, a pervy girl hasÂ gotta be able to dress flyÂ on the fly.
Critically,Â I also ran all of my errands, got the thyroid meds for the brocat #A,Â and my beloved top hat back from the ex-un-boyfriend.
I had a crazy momentary flirtation withÂ The Red Rubber Dress this morning.Â It IS tehÂ fabulous and ofÂ super heavy gauge, and thereforeÂ far more forgiving that the average latex dress.Â But I couldn’t bear the thought of getting a bottle of lube and greasing myself up.
Not this weekend.Â
So nowÂ I get to go be sassy pervy Negress-On-The-Spot, and explain to my overwhelmingly white audience how hot it is to do really filthy nasty edgy play on the precipice of racial and cultural cliffsÂ & crevasses…and why that absolutely are never ever allowed to initiate the aforementioned play with PoC.
Â Gods, I need to get laid.Â
Just a nice hard slammy brutal fuck up against a wall over the edge of a cushion across the floor withÂ wails and rugburns and that metallic taste in your mouth that is soÂ gorgeously generated by arousalpanic.
Â More likely, though, it will be me and my Wahl Vibrator.
Which I, thankfully, remembered to pack.
I love masturbating.
Â This, at the very least, guarantees me a BIT ofÂ fun this weekend, stag status be damned!