I was inspired to write a piece about coming out to my Mom about being kinky. I was inspired by a moment of very deep gratitude when i saw a friend talking about how unaccepting her Mother had been about her sexuality.
So fucking Uncool.
I’m doubly proud that, when I called Mom to ask if she minded me writing the piece, and on top of that if she was OK with my using a photo of the two if us together, she said she was happy to have both of those things happen.
Not bad for a nice Baptist church lady, eh?
From the column…
I took a deep breath, asked her if she really wanted to know, since it had to do with my sexuality. She said yes, she did want to know. So I braced myself and told her I’d been in Washington DC to teach a class at Black Rose… a kink and BDSM convention.
“Bondage & Discipline, Dominance & Submission Sadism & Masochism. You know, the whips and chains people.”
“Oh! Wow. And here I though you were a lesbian and were embarrassed to tell me.”
I laughed silently. But I figured now wasn’t the time to lay on the outing myself as bisexual as well: if my high-school triad hadn’t given it away, she didn’t need this additional data point right then!
She asked me some surprisingly challenging questions, and when she asked me how it was to give people spankings, I realized I had to come out to her again… as a submissive.
“Now that is a surprise. I would have though you would be a dominatrix!”
“Yeah, Ma, so does everyone else…”