Dec 082011
 

photo by stacie joy

This week’s SexIs Magazine column is one where I offer some advice to one of the less-likely-to-be-advised demographic in the kink junglelands: Teh Twue Dominates.

Well, and the regular dominants, masters, owners and tops, too.

Seven (random) Suggestions for Dominant Types

 

Hubris, you say, for me, a mere trembling flower of submission to dare to advise the domly doms?

 

Yes, mine is a Quixotic quest.

 

But I gotta tilt at windmills. Especially Fancypants Florentine-flogging dominate windmills :-P

 

Yeah yeah, I know each and every one of you D-Types are special snowflake lone Alpha-wolves, running along the dark paths of kink , howling at the moon, sniffling the tender flesh of nubile submissives, and doin’ your own thang. Respect. Mad props to ya. But keep in mind? With power comes responsibility. You can call the shots all you want. But without humility, discipline and flexibility, it’s not likely you’ll be the boss of anyone for very long. 

 

Over my years involved in kink circles, I’ve noticed that some dominant-types take pride in not taking advice from anyone, insisting that they make the rules and it is the responsibility of the submissive to adjust themselves and adhere to their world-view. And ultimately, yes: the master masters, and the slave slaves. But without negotiation, compromise and compassion? The stage is set for breakdowns, conflict and the corrosion of resentment. 

 

…read it all, baby!

 

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  One Response to “This week on SexIs Magazine: “7 Random Suggestions for Dominant Types!””

  1. I thought that article was awesome! Your point about consistency is exactly why I don’t do complicated protocol, even though I know that really turns some people on. I know that I would slip up, I would miss a mistake on my submissive’s part, fail to correct it, and then they’d start wondering if I really cared.

    Over my years involved in kink circles, I’ve noticed that some dominant-types take pride in not taking advice from anyone, insisting that they make the rules and it is the responsibility of the submissive to adjust themselves and adhere to their world-view.

    One of my many personal pet peeves is people who think they’re so smart they have nothing left to learn. Or that calling themselves dominant somehow magically makes them infallible.

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