Blog
POC @ LLC! Tell your story ASAP!
I am deeply honored and delighted to have been invited to present and share at the Leather Leadership Conference XIV this April 9th-11th , in Detroit, Michigan! I am sure some of you will be in attendance, but I know that not everyone can do so. I’m asking for your input, you thoughts, and your…
Read MoreGo away!
Yeah, welcome to my newest post…where I encourage you to LEAVE my blog and go read someone else’s. While a Top and a bottom in BDSM experience different stress triggers and excitements, both produce body responses that brain must process and recover from. Whether it is a physical scene or a psychological one, the top…
Read More
I’ve always wanted to be a Poster Child!
I am so excited I am beyond words. I’ve been asked to pose for the poster for the Folsom Street Fair 2010. Throw confetti on me!
Read More
e[lust] #7
Welcome to e[lust] – your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #7? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s…
Read MoreAsk The Negress: Q & A. To the submissives…
Q: What tips do you think all submissives need to hear, in your experience? from formspring.me … courtesy of Nadia West Take. Your. Time. BDSM isn’t going anywhere. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone, and waiting is just fine. Plunging in headfirst is awesome, until it isn’t. Think of it this way: sure,…
Read MoreInternational Ms. Leather! Yea, I need HELP!!
As many of you know, upon my being awarded the Title Ms. San Francisco Leather, it became part of my Titleholder responsibility to represent San Francisco in the International Ms. Leather Competition. Since 2009 was the first Ms. San Francisco Leather contest in a decade, this is a very exciting and somewhat daunting run I…
Read More
Ask The Negress: Q & A (with Kyle & Sasha!)
“When you’re feeling down or just run down, is there a favorite comfort food you tend to crave? And why?”  ~ButchtasticKyle  Have you listened to Double Meat (http://www.doublemeatpodcast.com)? I hear that it’s THE podcast for women who want to be “spit roasted” by 2 fat nerds. Also, how’s my hair look today? ~Sasha…
Read MoreBad Submissive.
Thick skin yet sensitive. Ably shielded yet vulnerable. How the fuck are we supposed to function as people, and as submissive people, yet remain vulnerable enough to let others see who we can be when we are in that headspace? These days, I have brief, rare, small glimpses into being submissive. But the rough lumpish…
Read MoreSeattle. Because SF isn’t damp and rainy ENOUGH.
I’ll be in Seattle this weekend…come by and say hi, hang out, join the conversation! Saturday, January 16 1:30 PM to 3:30 PM:Â Being a person of color in the BDSM community 4:00 PM to 6:00 PM:Â Embracing Dichotomy: Strong Slaves, Bodacious Bottoms & Ass-Kicking Submissives Sunday, January 17 1:30 PM to 3:30 PM: Flying…
Read More“Best Sex Writing” reviewed by Jezebel!
Sex Ed: Best Sex Writing 2010 Takes On Race Play, Swinging, And “Sexy Dwarfs” The title of Best Sex Writing 2010 may mislead some people — this (mostly) isn’t porn, but rather a collection of essayistic pieces on topics ranging from condoms to fisting. Which isn’t to say the book — edited by Rachel Kramer…
Read MoreHelp for Haiti
We’re all busy. And lots of us aren’t wealthy. But if you are reading this, you have the time to send a text message and ten bucks. You can text “HAITI” to 90999 to donate $10 to Red Cross relief efforts in Haiti. Help via UNICEF Help via Yéle Hati, Wyclef Jean’s organization.
Read MoreNo longer on speaking terms with Las Vegas.
Click through for some amusing pictures. Or don’t. Meh.
Read MoreHow to Guarantee I Won’t Date You.
I received this solicitation on a BDSM dating site. And I quote…. Master[REDACTED] Age: 37 Gender: Man Location: New Hampshire, United States Message: Hi babe :) I like what you have to say in your profile sugar :) LOL I’m a Dom looking for a slave whore to do what ever I want her to…
Read More
e[lust] #4
Welcome to e[lust] – your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #5? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s…
Read MoreAsk The Negress: Breakup Voodoo.
From Formspring… Q: When a relationship ends, what is the best approach for moving on and regaining self, things that you lost while in that relationship? A: This is so mutable. (Which is OK. Gemini’s a mutable sign. I’m good) The circumstances of the relationship have EVERYTHING to do with the breakup. How long was…
Read MorePolytiquette
Wondering, poly-minded people, from your experience, how you handle this situation! Poly person #1 asks you to hook up / get down. You’re cool with it, and it just so happens you know / are friends with / are otherwise cool with their partner, PolyPerson #2. How do you approach this negotiation? DO you talk…
Read More
Ask The Negress: For the New Kids on the Block.
Putting up a kink-related Q&A from Formspring.me. Wanna see your question posted on my blog? Ask me now! I respond to all of ’em and questions that nudge me or seem to resonate for folks will make it here :-) Do you have any advice for people who are new to public scenes/BDSM in general?…
Read MoreAsk The Negress: Privacy & Perversion.
This new Formspring thing is pretty amazing. I’ve been blessed with some amazing questions, and have seen some wonderful answers to questions I’ve asked. One in particular has been resonating for many people, so I wanted to post it here. I’m coming (painfully) out of my first relationship that had a true BDSM element, but…
Read MoreSF Exiles Carnal Carnival ~ TONIGHT!
Carnal Carnival ~ TONIGHT! Friday, December 18, 2009 Program starts at 7:30pm Remember those hot summer nights at the county fair, feeling the thrill of the rides and trying your hand at throwing baseballs at milk jugs? THAT’S NOT THIS. Instead, we have a hot winter night of kink, fun, music, and debauchery! Throw a…
Read More
HNT ~ The Magic in the Music
Happy HNT! I experimented a while back with a more kinetic HNT, and I may be the first person freakish enough to have gone there. I challenged myself to do something fun this week, and so I went for another motion-sensitive clip. Then I got zesty and decided I was gonna put some music to…
Read More
Facefull of epiphany.
I’m a bit of a “woo-tard” in that my “woo woo” stuff….spiritual and emotionally friable shit…tends to be the one area of my life I really hesitate to share. So, because of my weird compulsion that shoves me towards greater and greater revelation, I tend to spill my guts in various ways. For better or…
Read More
When dominants fuck up.
Yet another thought provoking and moving post from CoyoteToo. I swear, some days I wonder is this man the only male-identified dominant writing about their emotional journey on the net? Seriously, if you know of another, please clue me in the comments here. :-) Anyway, he posted something today and you should read all of…
Read Moree[Lust] #3
HNT Courtesy of 13Messages Welcome to e[lust] ♦ This Week’s Top Three Posts ♦ Presence – I wish that you would look at me now. I am willing you to look at me now, over her body, rocking with the motion of her mouth. But you do not. Restraint – “Do you like what you…
Read More